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Sabina Matos Cafe

  • Parent Category: What's New
  • Published on Wednesday, 16 March 2011 01:16
  • Written by Michelle Gonzalez
  • Hits: 1109

Sabina Matos CafeOur second cafe was a huge success on April 26, 2011 featuring Sabina Matos, recently elected Providence Council woman, the work she does at New Roots, and her story about how and why she ran for Councilwoman in a ward with a 27 year veteran...and to do so 2 consecutive elections, to finally win in 2010!  We explored key themes in how Sabina was able to lead in her own way, raise a family, and find a way to maintain her soul while in a controversial political race.

Key lessons from Sabina's story:

  • Taking up the call for civic engagement
  • Going from the behind the scenes to"being in the scene"
  • Mobilizing support from all around and trusting it
  • Identifying and knowing deeply who you are even if others see you as someone else
  • Staying on the point: Why more women need to be at the table
  • Importantly, we uncovered the practice of "rugged resilience"

Below are our the participants notes and the key practices we wanted to work on next in our leadership practice. Please feel free to add your comments!  Also, the attendees indicated with color dots which leadership lesson would be their first practice to take on (green dot) and second practice (red dot). 


Key lessons, practices or ideas to bring forward

Cafe conversation 1: How to strengthen our voice to get past labeling self or others labeling me (1 green, 1 red)

  • How to continue to do this!Step out of the box, not just push out on the walls…get out of stuck.  Concept of labels and fighting…it allows the label and fight keeps it going…to stop focus on fighting it.
    •  Listen to self your heart, not ego (1 red)
    • Women…communicate!...articulate…best to be silent—listen
    •  No answer
    • Divert negativity
  • Goal is to get past drama it leads to: negativity, labeling and addition!
  • Rugged resilience (1 green)
    • Can do it all—but not at once (1 red)
    • Allow for imperfection either in others or myself
  • Communication – “I want to build on that person’s point”…right or wrong
    • Constantly thinking where someone’s ego is, and that I don’t lead by ego
    • Let go of Ego or our own and others (1 green)
  • Drama – no facts, process…waste time being emotional


Cafe conversation 2: Decision-making – how do you process sides, impacts, values, controversy
How to be confident with decision

  • Mistakes happen and one learns more about from failure.
  • Allow yourself and others to be imperfect/wrong (3 green)
  • At that moment it was the best decision to make (1 red, 1 green).  Ask:  Is this based on fear or what I value – love – place of purity. Realize decisions are dynamic not static…ok to change
  • Influencing your decision: drawing on the wisdom of others who have been there.
    • Take your advise under consideration, but I make my own decision.
  • Timing is everything: “shit or get off the pot” (or importantly if you don't someone will make the decision for you)
  • Read the 4 agreements and the 4 noble truths, or the book that Sabina recommended:  The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
    • How to allow for space to make decisions…calendar, respect
    • Taking time is seen as wishy-washy…
    • Try to live by these
  • Influencing your decision. You’re second guessing your decision.Sometimes being tough is misunderstood…how to be tough and feel good about it.

Cafe conversation 3: How do I take a physical limitation and carry on – taking care of my body and self, my work, and being compassionate and vulnerable:

  • Communication/network for help with your goals?
  • Live one day at the time. Rely on your support system, don’t be afraid to ask for help (2 red dots)
  • Strategy – inform others, group motivate!
  • Being aware of your own self limiting beliefs so you don’t let them take power over you. Listen to your surroundings (1 red).
    • From Sabina Matos:   some may feel we have to show we are strong…when we are ready for help.
  • Perspective from others that she was ambitious when she had trust.
  • My Concern – it is limiting to call limitations, what they are: limitations. Experiences empower, inform…so it is best to accept a current reality and get the help, and support I need with a limitation... don't ignore it.

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